The Trappings of a Poor Childhood
by AssasinNinja
Summary: Sakura meets with Naruto to discuss something that has been weighing heavy on her soul for some time. Her dark truth is that Naruto Uzumaki does not in fact exist, he is and always has been Sakura Haruno's imaginary friend. Bear with me, it's not as crazy as it seems.


**Before we begin, I want to start by saying how irrational of a concept this is. It doesn't make any sense, and probably never could, no matter how much research and evidence I 'invented' to rationalize this idea. But it sprung into my head, and I love the film Fight Club.**

**Don't hate me too harshly, but I thought it might be something worth expanding on. It's shorter than I would've liked, but the concept doesn't leave much room for expansion, except for maybe in a Calvin and Hobbes comic strip.**

**Uh, well enjoy.**

"Can I talk to you?" Sakura asked, sitting down on a tree stump.

"Sure." Naruto replied, smiling as usual, as he sat on the ground in front of her.

Sakura literally twiddled her thumbs as she hesitated to speak. For some reason or another, she was reluctant to begin talking, and Naruto grew worried. She looked up at him, and sadly smiled. Her eyes were glazed over with the future promise of tears.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"There's something I have to tell you." The sadness of her voice made his heart sink.

"Tell me, then." Naruto said nervously.

"Okay... I don't know anyway else to say this, Naruto... you're my imaginary friend."

Naruto's brow creased momentarily as he was thrown off by the absurdity of her statement, then he smiled and said, "I don't quite understand the metaphor."

"It isn't a metaphor Naruto." Sakura sighed deeply, "You're a figment of my imagination."

Naruto stared at her in shock, then laughed awkwardly. He leaned forward and pressed his hand against her forehead, "Are you feeling okay, Sakura?"

She gently brushed his hand away and stared sadly into his blue orbs, "Tsunade said I had to confront you about it... if I ever wanted to be normal."

"She said to be normal you had to tell me I was a figment of your imagination?" Naruto laughed, "Does that make any sense to you?"

Sakura took a deep breath and bit down on her lower lip. She placed her hands on Naruto's shoulders and exhaled, "Let me explain."

"Please do." Naruto laughed again, "Because I'm absolutely lost."

Sakura took a minute to gather her wits about her. Naruto sat there anxiously, worried his friend had gone completely crazy. Finally, Sakura began, "It all started when I joined the academy..."

She inhaled quickly before continuing, "... I didn't have any friends, because Ino had stopped liking me because of Sasuke. I was lonely, and jealous of Sasuke for having Ino's attention. I also liked Sasuke, he was so cute and mysterious, and I was torn. So I started pretending I had a friend, someone who was indifferent toward Ino and was completely devoted to me. Someone who hated Sasuke unlike everyone else."

"Before I continue, I should tell you there is a history of mental illness in my family, my father suffers from insomnia and my mom's mother was a schizophrenic, so even though this person started as just your typical imaginary friend, they quickly turned into a psychotic manifestation," She exhaled, "You."

Naruto cringed, despite the fact he knew that was coming, something about the way Sakura was setting things up made him more than a little uneasy.

She continued, "Over time, I started using you as an outlet for my rage, and a scapegoat for the consequences. Every time a teacher yelled at me, or someone mad fun of me, I imagined they were doing it to you. And I laughed along with them, because I knew you deserved it."

Naruto, who had been making eye-contact with Sakura until now, suddenly found himself unable to meet her gaze. He looked away, and focused hard on the ground.

"Every time I failed, I said it had been you. Every time I made a fool of myself, it was just Naruto being himself. Every time I had a dream that was deemed impossible, I said that it was yours." She cleared her throat, "You know that I failed the test to get out of the academy? I got nervous and messed up... Iruka-sensei took me out to ramen afterwards, and I explained and he let me retake it that night. There never was a Mizuki or a forbidden scroll, I made that up so you'd seem more heroic."

"Thanks." Naruto said, half-jokingly.

"That first day, when we got assigned our teams... it was me who accidentally kissed Sasuke. Well, not accidentally. When he didn't respond to it as agreeably as I hoped, I blamed it all on you." Sakura said sadly, "We had the only two-member team in the village, due to an odd number of students. That's why we got Kakashi as a sensei, and spent so much time working rudimentary missions."

"Of course." Naruto said, rolling his eyes a bit.

"I also cloned myself and disguised it as Sasuke, just so I could feel what it would be like if he really loved me... but I chickened out and released the clone right before we kissed... I once again blamed it on you."

Naruto's left eye twitched, he had yet to reveal to Sakura that he had disguised himself to earn a kiss, so, "How do you know about that?"

"I just told you how."

"If this is all some elaborate punishment for me lying to you-"

"Naruto... I promise you. I'm telling the truth." Naruto calmed down momentarily as he listened to Sakura continue her story, "You weren't just a hinderance or a scapegoat though, you were a source of strength. Every time I doubted myself, I knew that you could save the day. I knew you had the power and will to succeed despite the odds. I could always count on you."

"When I beat Ino in the chuunin exams, I was so scared because I knew I couldn't beat Neji or Sasuke or any of the other finalists, so I said that you had progressed by beating Kiba, where in reality, Sasuke had beaten Kiba not that sound ninja, I fabricated him too. I pretended that me and Ino had ended our match in a draw, and tried to push the chuunin finals out of my mind."

"I met Jiraiya when Kakashi wouldn't train me, and the pervert only agreed to train me because he was attracted to me. We eventually became friends, but I could never bond with him as you might, so I let him be your mentor, and waited to find mine." She sighed, "I beat Neji with what Jiraiya taught me, which wasn't how to summon toads but how to better control my chakra."

"Stop." Naruto said, "None of this is true, you're talking crazy."

Her eyes were watering, "I didn't chase after Sasuke, I sent you instead... but I didn't go, so Sasuke escaped. You were never really there because I stayed home, the others tried to rescue him on their own. So when Jiraiya left, I sent you with him, and for those years of your 'training' you ceased to exist, and I found my mentor in Tsunade."

"Sakura, why are you saying all this?" Naruto's eyes were starting to water too.

"The Akutsuki, the World War for the tailed beasts, they weren't what actually happened... it was all political, and I had no reason to fight in a war of politics. I had already invented the 9 tailed fox for you, so I made him the reason for the conflict, and so we had a reason to fight," Sakura shivered, "The Fourth Hokage was assassinated in his sleep, and he never had an heir. Your mother isn't real."

"Shut up!" Naruto screamed, standing up, "This isn't like you, Sakura... you're not irrational!"

"As for Hinata, I knew she had fallen in love with me... but I'm not a lesbian, and I couldn't break her heart. I pretended I was ignorant, and cast her on to you, as I have done with so many of my problems." She sniffed, "I am sorry for everything, Naruto."

Naruto fell to his butt, "Sakura, you've gone insane."

"That's exactly the point Naruto... but now, I'm fixing everything. Tsunade has taught me that you aren't real, you're just my imaginary friend. I have to get on with my life, and now that Sasuke is back, I'm ready to have a life with him. He loves me Naruto, Ino has been my friend again for years, and I don't need you anymore. It's time I learned to live without you." Her tears were flowing, "I'm going to miss you."

Naruto laughed, a dark humorless laugh, "Sakura, you're not making any... sense."

He looked down at his hands, and he might've sworn they were turning invisible.

"What... what's going on?"

"I'm moving on." Sakura said, "You were never rational Naruto, no one loves as unconditionally as you."

Now, Naruto knew for sure that his hands were vanishing, along with his arms, and his legs, "No... NO!"

Sakura stood up off the stump and walked over to Naruto, his head was starting to fade away. She kissed him on the cheek, "You were the best part of me, Naruto. I love you."

As his blue eyes vanished from existence, his imaginary tear drops soaked the grass. For a minute, Sakura thought she had made a mistake, that she had too soon erased her best friend from reality. But she knew better now, she knew the truth.

And, if she ever wanted to see Naruto again, she only had to dream about him.

That small comfort did nothing to keep her from crying until the sunset.


End file.
